He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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