I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize