If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
i now understand why vodka
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
