So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
