What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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