You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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