So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize