9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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