I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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