I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
