Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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