I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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