So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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