I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Is it penis luge time yet?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
