Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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