So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
