all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
