I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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