Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
