Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
