LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize