We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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