hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize