At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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