i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize