Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
