I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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