walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Randomize
