just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize