The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
