He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
