You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
