dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize