yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
