I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
