Im at strip club and am horny
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
