My hair reeks of homosexuality.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
