If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
