I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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