How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
