I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize