i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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