He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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