yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
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