I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
