OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
