plz talk dirty to me
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
