google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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