He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
