kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Terrible idea I love it
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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