doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
